The Day It Became Real

Personal thoughts, feelings

The Day It Became Real

A couple of days ago, I talked to Lelaine about setting a date for our move and buying one-way tickets to France. I know my heart was beating a lot faster even just talking about it. It felt like putting an end to all the dreaming, all the light chit-chats about life in France after we settle down. All the research, YouTube city walkthroughs, imagining life there together, eating good quality food, bicycling through the countryside on our way to the Mediterranean Sea… Everything changed big time for me with the realization: WE ARE DOING IT. We have a concrete date for our relocation.

I know we're still seven months from moving, but personally, things are hitting me a little harder when I see people I run into regularly—at stores, at my favorite coffee place in Belfair (Urban Grind), or a few days ago when I played golf with one of my best friends in Sequim. There's a certain sadness, a little anxiousness, but at the same time, curiosity and excitement blanketing my body, my mind.

It is—and it will be—a big change for me again, like when I left Hungary a long time ago. And I know it will be an even bigger change for Lelaine, since she's never been to Europe. I know it will be a culture shock for her, and most likely for me too, since it's been such a long time since I left Europe.

I have to be strong for her, a stable rock. She's leaving a lot more behind than me. But I know we'll be fine.

We have to find things to do right away—like a gym, or a library, or a craft place for our creativity (handmade crafts, ceramics, woodworking). A place we can frequent regularly. I think that would definitely help us integrate easier and give us the feeling that we belong here, this is where we want to be, this is the place we'll call home.

I know I need structure and stability to function at my full potential and to keep my mind occupied and calm. I know Lelaine will support me just like I will her. We're a team in this adventure.

Right now my feelings are up and down, but never a doubt about our decision to move. I started these ramblings about how I feel with some anxiety, but now at the end of this post, I've become more excited about our future together in France, in Montpellier.

Well, I think I've left everything on the table—how I feel, my thoughts. I'm sure more of these kinds of quick posts will appear on our site, and it feels good to be able to express what's going on inside.

Cheers, and all the best to us.

—Andras